Are you cleared to know this?

HI! I haven't been talking very much ... to anyone. It's been a rough week for me. Two months ago this week Bobby told me he was leaving me; and even without knowing the exact date things happened, my body, my psyche, my heart knows. Bobby has been incredibly kind and lvoing towards me during all of this, and I think it's partly because he's having a hard time, too; which makes me feel a bit better.

This weekend my plans have been good so far, and I'm sure they'll get better as I go along. Last night Bobby and I had dinner at my house, then we went to Anna Banana's for coffee and we took our laptops and putzed around online. He told me he needed to study, but ended up playing online instead - it was actually quite nice to just sit with him and be. After I got home I watched two episodes of Nip/Tuck and layed in bed talking to a friend through text messages. Today I'm meeting up with a friend (whose wedding I took photographs of three weeks ago ... and I still need to pick up those pictures!) for some window shopping (Ann Taylor Loft!!!) and lunch (California Pizza Kitchen finally made it's way to Portland!). Then I'm picking up some dinner food from the house and driving out to another friend's house to hang out with him. We've talked about hiking, or bowling, or whatever.

Tomorrow I'm going to do laundry, pick up my room a bit (I love living in just a ROOM right now ... so little to clean!) and mentally preparing myself for a new week at work. There's been a bit of drama there, and so I may need a couple of hours to prepare.

all i want to say

boys are skeezy shit slime

except 1
/end

Check it Out!!

Not only did I change the layout a bit, I added a BlogRoll and changed up my profile, too! Now to find something to tell you all about! Or maybe to get a few readers first!!

I don't write enough here ... give me prompts!

It's pictures like this- from The Daily Kitten - that make me want a kitty so badly. Bobby took my Max with him because I couldn't, but as soon as I live alone, I will be getting a kitty again.

Ultimately I'd like to get a orange female kitty with extra toes, but since most orange kitties are males, I'll have to think about that. However, then I have to think about boy NAMES for a kitty ... which would take some brain power that I wasn't anticipating. However, since I'm pretty sure it'll be a while before I live alone, I have some time to think of a name.

It's 2:30pm and I've essentially done nothing all day. I was up before 9am and have been playing online most of the day. Actually, I did do some laundry. I'm sure the stuff in the dryer is calling my name at this point and needs to be folded, but that requires getting up and doing just that. I don't mind doing laundry, but I sure as heck, for some strange reason, mind folding it and putting it away.

I won 24Yankee candles on eBay for $12. I'm happy with that being cheap and getting a high quality. Now I just have to hope they dont' get melty in the mail! That would be nasty!!

Please ask me questions so I know what to talk about here!!!

http://www.flagrantdisregard.com/flickr/hockney.php

I found a cool site that will put your pictures into this format, so I had to do some of my favorites.

I love how it handled the one of me - that my eyes are in one shot and my nose and mouth are in another. I also am happy that you can't see my wedding ring & bands in it. This was taken in May - when I thought things were a-okay. : )

It's my favorite picture of myself, ever, and so I was really pleased with it. I may do something within my profile with the shot, or I may play with the number of polaroids they use to see what differences I can make.
I love this picture of Bobby and I ... even now. I especially love that there are SO many fragmented little pieces in this big set ... as things really are now. This is a really old picture (September of last year, I think?) and the trip holds so many good memories for me; I think it always will.

I am all about the photograph sharing today, huh? 

How I'm Feeling

I so badly want a print of this Kurt Halsey picture. I can't find it anywhere but his site still, but I just want a cheap print of it for now so that I can take it down and pass it on to someone else who needs it when I'm done with it. Any help would be appreciated. 

Highly Amusin

I laughed so hard that I had tears in my eyes. I appreciate my friends finding stuff like this!

This is the view into the back yard. There is a lawnchair out there now because a friend of the roommates was sunbathing. It was good day to do so, too
This is some of the "gardening" spot I hope to develop. It would be really neat to have a little spot to play in the dirt that would be all mine. We'll see if we can make that happen!
This is the full back yard ... there are multiple lawn chairs AND a hammock. I haven't laid in it yet, but I will soon enough!!! 

This here is the view of the living room from the front door. You can see the chair, and the large TV there as well. I like it. I don't much care for the rug, but it's there. *shrug* What can I do?

I need to "explore" the little knick-knacks that are on the shelf up there ... I haven't done that yet.






This is my new spot. Jenn sat on this thing and so she knows how it feels ... COMFORTABLE. The porch swing is surrounded on two sides by vines, one side by the front window of the house, and then it's open to the porch. I sat out there tonight eating my dinner and just BEING. It was really nice and I think you'll probably be able to find me out there if I'm not curled up on my bed!








This is Booker. He's a llasa apso/poodle mix. He barks at anyone who shows up at the house, but once you come inside, he's great. He's a lover, not a biter. :)



This is the back porch and the hot tub. Right now the tub is actually full of COLD water, which is nice on a hot day. You can kinda sorta see into the backyard here, too. 

This is the other side of the bathroom. I have two glass shelves and I will probably put pictures on one of them and "stuff" on the other. We'll see. For now, my roommates stuf sits on it. :)













This is my corner in the study. I may soon have a steel and glass "corner" desk that I'll put there so that I can craft in a certain spot. We'll see ... if not I hope to move a chair in so that I have another places to just sit and BE.
This is the kitchen and dining room if viewed from the hallway. The floor pattern cracks me up and I really like it. There is plenty of storage in here, and although it's a bit cluttered, I'll make due with what I can change. : )














This is the living room view from the hallway. It's painted a sagey green and calming. The chair AND couch are super-comfortable and I would have no problem relaxing out there. There is also a woodburning fireplace inside that we actually get to USE during the cold month! I like fire. :D 

This is my monster sized closet. My clothes AND jackets take up 1/4 of the space - and I am going to have fun putting things into the rest of it all. I'm going to be storing a lot of things here. There is a huge backpack that fits on the little (like 8" tall) shelf at the top, and I think that I might be able to get one of my under-the-bed boxes up there. There are two rods, and so I have plenty of room.

Right now there are plenty of RANDOM things inside the closet, including three "tupperware" things of randomosity and boxes of things that have yet to be unpacked. I know there is a bike helmet and a fleece scarf in that CICLON box there, though! ; )







This is my other window. Outside of it is a huge bamboo plant, but it still allows air to come in. It's nice to have it there because it creates shade, adds some random color to the room and it makes me feel peaceful. I started burning a candle already in it (Yankee's buttercream) and my room smells marvelous already. You can also see the beautiful rose tea-tray that my friend Megan made me (tiled mosaic) for my bridal shower. It made me cry because it's just gorgeous. : )

There is also a fishbowl in this picture ... because I'm going to get a fish. I'm going to get a red Betta fish ... and I already have his name picked out. Get ready for this ... you know how weird I am ... and I'm going name my RED Betta fish Stalin. *hehehehe* I'm insane like that.

You can also kinda see my "Dance Me To The End of Love" picture (Jack Vettriano) that one of my bridesmaids gave me for our wedding gift. I love it, and so it moved with me!

This is where I'm sitting right now! I have a trundle bed (there's another twin underneath the one on top) and you can even see my lap desk and my laptop along with my blue wallet, my favorite little yellow (chenille) pillow that my best friend's (and Maid of Honor) mom made me for high school graduation. Underneath that pillow is my bear Barneby. Bobby got that bear for me once when I was incredibly sick. I had the flu and was really angry that I couldn't serve Thanksgiving dinner at the homeless shelter and so on his way home from serving he stopped and bought me Barneby. B has been hiding in a box since I moved in with Bobby, as it was kinda weird to sleep with him AND Bobby, but now that it's just me, I get Barneby back! :)

This is my little bathroom. The purple towels are mine, and eventually I will have the rest of my stuff put up, but I want to check with the roommate before I take any of her stuff down - even though she told me that I could. I'm strangely polite like that sometimes! 

This is my room, it's a total mess since I just moved in, but eventually I will have it spotless like I like it. For now I'm actually sitting on that daybed in the corner RELAXING and keeping myself together. It's a nice feeling.








This is what you would see if you turned directly right when you enter the door. There is a 5 1/2 foot tall shelving unit in the corner with the TV and the DVD player on it. On top of the hope chest is a few boxes and the cable box. We have to call the company to get them to hook it all up so that I have "the wand" and can watch the million-zillion channels we get.

You can also see the second window in my room. Eventually I hope to make either polka-dot or checkered drapes/curtains for them, as I think that would make things look even more fun in here!







This is the burgandy wall in the room. It looks a bit washed out in this picture, but it really is a pretty color. It's what I based a lot of my room decorating ideas on. The bulletin board has been "stored" in the office of the old apartment for years. I've not had it up in a VERY long time. It has pictures on it (two) from my Senior year of high school (SIX years ago! eek) and a picture of my mom & aunt on a cruise. There is also a funny card from my best friend, a picture she drew me, a photograph of young Matt Damon and Ben Affleck and a fun bumper sticker that says; "I'm not weird, I'm special" and it so applies to me.

My hope chest - which is what the big box & the cable box are sitting on is full of books. I have a book shelf, but I want to paint it before I put my books on it, so they're "hiding" for now!



This is what is directly in front of my door. My dresser, that eventually I hope to refinish and paint or what not. It matches the wood that is in the room, but I'd like it to be a COLOR rather than woodgrained.

Inside those drawers is a HUGE mess of BLECH that I cannot wait to empty out and REDO! I'm weird like that. 

Moving In and Moving On

I'm in my new house for the first night, and I'm not crying like I thought I would be.
I took pictures, am editing them and will be posting them soon for anyone who cares!